Don Randall –

Most people have probably never heard of Don Randall, but many know what he did.

Don Randall worked for Leo Fender Musical Instruments in 1950. He was in charge of Marketing. Randall named their first product the “Broadcaster”, when they found out they had to change the name due to a conflict with another company, her renamed that guitar the “Telecaster”.

Four years later he found the name for one of the greatest guitars if not the greatest guitar in history, “The Stratocaster”.

Don Randall died on December 23rd at the age of 91.

Music Stores –

Music stores are strange places. They are tough to hang out in because there is always some kid playing Metallica or Zeppelin way too loud on some piece of crap guitar from Korea.

The worst aspect of these stores is usually the staff. Many times you will find that employees at a typical music store have an ego the size of Texas. They all think they are musical gods and you are shit. They often ignore people or just make them feel uncomfortable. These people only work in a store so they can have free time to rock with their band that is on the verge of a huge record deal.

One particular store in my area was the most egregious of any that I have ever been in. They were always that was as long as I can remember. They closed this week, a result of the economy. I think it was a result of their shitty attitude.

I stopped in during their going out of business sale to see if there were any deals. There was not much that was reasonable or deeply discounted. They had signs on the guitars that said “If you’re not thinking of buying it you’re not trying it”. Their don’t waste my time attitude had clearly not changed. Shit like that made it hard for me to have any sympathy for them.

Back in high school I ditched school after a fight with a teacher. I had a bunch of money in my pocket and found myself driving by the store. I went in and looked around. A Fender Strat caught my eye. It was a Mexican Strat that cost around $300. I decided to buy it. The guy who worked that department was on the phone. I took the guitar up to buy it and he ignored me. He was having a personal conversation with someone. I waited for a few minutes the asshole was still on the phone. I went back to the guitar wall put back the black and white Strat and picked up another one. The second guitar was much pricier, over a grand but looked identical to the first. Ten minutes later the guy hung up and said something like “OK, what do you want?” I put the strat on the counter, and told him that I was going to buy this today, but since he couldn’t bother to get off the damn phone I would be heading to their competition and someone else would get the commission. I walked out, went to another store and bought a Strat.

That was in 1992 and the place has not improved in the last 16 years.

So sorry your store closed, maybe if you were nicer to people you would have survived.

Fucking people –

I can’t believe the way people act in public. I was in Target today finishing up some Christmas shopping. I am walking down towards the electronics section and I see a little boy sitting in a cart, he was maybe three years old. He was calling “Nana, Nana” over and over. I see a heavy set woman walking toward him and telling him to sit back down. She was maybe twenty feet away from the cart. All was fine.

I was looking for a DVD and I hear the kid again. I figured the woman was down another isle a little ways. I was looking for the DVD for about five minutes when I gave up and moved on. I walked past the little boy who was still calling for his Nana. This time I didn’t see her. I walked a bit further and kept looking back to see if he was alright. Finally I turned around and watched the kid for a bit. The woman was not coming back.

I walked back down towards the kid, looking for the woman. I didn’t see her. I walked past him and was still looking for the woman. By this time other people were noticing the boy and an older woman started talking to him. The boy calmed down a little now that someone was talking to him. I was still looking around. A crowd was starting to gather; it had been about ten minutes now. The woman talked to the boy while I looked through the isle for his Nana. Five minutes later, as I was thinking of calling the cops, she walks out of an isle no where near the kid. With her is another woman, the kids Mom I guess. They both left this kid in the isle alone stuck in a cart for fifteen minutes.

The Mom and Nana waddle over to the kid like nothing is wrong. Everyone around the kid give them dirty looks.

A few minutes later I see them again pushing the kid the Mom says to Nana “They was bout to call Child Protective Services”.

Who the hell leaves a kid unattended in a busy store for fifteen minutes?

Knife Show –

I hate the term “guilty pleasures” but I must confess that I have one. It’s The Knife Show. It is a home shopping show that just sells knives.

I don’t watch because I buy lots of knives. I watch because it is pure comedy. Everything they sell is the lowest price ever seen by human eyes. Where else can you see a guy with a heavy southern accent sell “A genuine stag bone Dale Ernhardt Jr. Bowie Knife”? Of course is comes with the highly collectable gift box all for $15.00

I never get sick of it. They yell all night, and everything is in extreme limited availability.

For the record, I have never bought a thing, but damn do they amuse me.

A fucked up situation –

A woman in Iran was blinded when a guy who said he was in love with her threw acid in her face. She is permanently blind and disfigured. During the trial she asked the court to blind him, as per Islamic law that demands and eye for an eye.

The court agreed and sentenced him to be blinded by acid. The victim also asked that he just be blinded with the acid and it not be thrown in his face. She said disfiguring the man would be a savage and barbaric act.

So my question is when does justice becomes revenge? Of course she wants payback, but I can’t imagine life in an Iraqi jail to be fun. Then again if more offenders had to pay serious consequences for their crimes would there be less crime?

Should a thief lose their hands? Should a rapist lose their junk?

In the end I think that a court sentencing someone to be blinded with acid is pretty fucking horrific. I don’t care what country it is, that is just getting even. No doubt this asshole should pay and pay dearly, but it should be justice not revenge.

Mummers –

The city has cut the budget for the Mummers parade and the whole thing is in jeopardy of not happening. After some complaining the city gave them 300 grand, less then half of what they usually get.

You know what, cancel the thing. The economy is shit, and the city is beyond broke. I think that we can live without The Mummers for one year. The money that the city is spending on the parade can probably save one of the Libraries that are closing.

If the Mummers want to do their thing they should book Lincoln Financial and charge admission to offset their costs. Any real Mummers fans can pony up some dough for one year. In the mean time maybe everyone else can go out to dinner on New Years day and help out some local business that are going to die in this recession.

How could it be a year –

It’s been a year since I talked to my Grandmother. A year without her calls, her voice, her presence in my life. How can that be?

A year ago yesterday she called me at work, or I called her. We spoke about something and then she told me she was worried about a check clearing. I transferred a couple of hundred bucks to her account online so she wouldn’t worry. She was fine. We said goodbye and the day went on like any other.

At nine o’clock that night my phone rang. It was my Mother, she told me that my Grandmother was on the way to the hospital by Ambulance. They didn’t know much more, Mom thought it was a stroke. It was.

When I got to the hospital she was awake, but vacant. The stroke was massive. It took everything. She was moving her left arm up and down. Her eyes were empty. I am not sure she knew I was there, she gripped my hand. By morning she was unconscious, by that night she was gone. December 4, 2007.

If you asked me a year ago what the worst year of my life was, I would have said 1999.

I have a new answer now.

Oh Donavan –

Everyone in this city is screaming at the top of their lungs to get rid of Donavan. I have not decided what I want to happen yet, but I will tell you this. Be careful what you wish for. This is Philly and it would not surprise me to see Donavan go to another team and come alive. Knowing this cities luck some team like the Bangles will take him as a second string, their QB will get hurt and he will go in and look like Brett Farve. All of a sudden a horrible team will go to 1st place and end up in the Super Bowl.

Probably not likely, but if it did happen I wouldn’t be shocked.